• Sun. Oct 2nd, 2022

Autistic Child Is Not Invisible | World Autism Day

ByShaheen Kazi

Apr 2, 2021

Dear God,

Thank you for giving me your garden’s most delicate flower. I am most grateful for choosing me as a gardener to take care of your flower. I humbly ask that hope be renewed within me. Forgive me for my times when I doubt my parenting and did pity on myself.

Lord, help me be the best parent I can be.

I pray that your Holy Spirit will teach me, your wisdom will guide me, and your blessings will touch me.

Amen.

When a child has a cold, fever, typhoid, flu, etc., we speak to our family, friends and society. But if your child has Autism, then what happens?

Why is it taboo to say “Autism” in a group or to someone? It becomes a private conversation between you and your physician. No parent is prepared to hear that a child has anything other than happy and healthy.

No parent would want to have their child suffer from medical problems or any disorder. But some things are not in the hands of any human.  But accepting things and working hard is in the hands of each human being.

Has anyone considered an autistic child what challenges he/she has to overcome? It’s not a smooth trip for both (children and parents). But you can make the journey gentle and calm in the way of working together. Our society begins with our family, our neighbours, our friends and then the outsiders.

But you (Parents) play an extremely delicate role between them. Your thoughts are the only key to unlock this gate of hesitations.

An autistic child is the parents’ responsibility; all family members have their roles towards this child. Likewise, every family member is essential in every function of a child’s progress. Also, be responsible for that child’s needs; do not treat that child as a guest in your leisure time. If you are a grandparent, use your retirement age for this lovely child by taking a shower of your time and care.

Our society, wherein we all live. Our community, too, plays a vital role in making the journey of the autistic child and their parents helpful or disrespectful.    When we see this beautiful child confronting the different challenges of his daily activities, we, the people, can never understand their struggle. That’s not an easy road for parents either.

Children with Autism are diagnosed in young age, mostly at the age of two. It’s not easy, or it can never be easy for a parent to embrace it. But this is the time where the parent has to be vital for their child.    Strength is the only key, which can overcome all difficulties gently and calmly. Never hesitate to introduce your child to others around you. Your child is a part of your life, and they have the right to be with everybody like every other child.

Young children with Autism have learning, communication and independence disabilities that are more easily acquired by others. But with the help of therapists and the generous support of their parents and charming people, it translates to a positive outcome.

There are specific guidelines that are being advised by the therapist /doctors, and those do’s and don’ts should be followed appropriately. It would be best if you share the procedures between your families – close friends and schools- that each person plays a proper role with your child. 

On this journey, sometimes, as a parent, you may be frustrated, or anger will catch you. But it would help if you avoided all the negativities that will distract you from your goal. You may come across some nasty people who can be easily found in families or outside of society. Their sarcastic remarks will easily wound you. DON’T REACT, DON’T ACT. Because people like that with no empathy are not human beings. It is, therefore, preferable to avoid such harmful people from your life and mind. 

Surround yourself with optimistic and positive people. I’m not saying every step as a parent will be very easy for you, but yes, it won’t give you the wrong result either. No matter what stage your child is at, he/she needs your support, love, and care at every step and location. 

When a child has Autistic

Learn about Autism – Educate yourself about this disorder and know more about treatment benefits and medications. Talk to your doctor and clear up your minor doubt. Be well informed about the condition.

 Monitor your child behaviour – Identify your kid challenges and how you will achieve a positive response.

What disturbs and displeases your child?

What are the best interests of your kid?

What do they like?

 If you can understand this behaviour which is the first step, you can avoid many problems which will cause trouble later.

Accept your child – The first thing to do is never compare your child with other children. Just focus on your child’s happiness, even a small milestone in your child’s success, enjoy and celebrate with your child. Splattering unconditional love and acceptance vibes will help your child more energetic than anything else.

Don’t give up – Never draw hasty conclusions about your child’s life. Never lose hope, my friend. Nothing comes in a single day; leading a successful life also requires hard work, commitment and patience. Therefore, being a parent, you must always keep all your hopes alive and happy. 

Help your child with some tips:

Make sure the house is safe. If your child is experiencing anger attacks or other self-injurious behaviours, make it a safe home.

Be consistent; it is essential to be consistent in interacting with your child and managing challenging behaviours.

Adhere to a schedule; follow your child’s established routine. Put together an excellent happy program, with regular plans for meals, therapy, school and bed. Do not make any changes in your patterns; if there are changes in your child’s daily routine, prepare them ahead of time. 

Reward the correct behaviour, praise them when they act correctly, or they have learned something new. That way, they will know clearly which measures they deserve. Also, look for other rewarding forms, such as giving them their favourite toy or any favourite food they love the most.

Find non-verbal ways to get online.

Are you aware that even your child is communicating with you, even though they never speak? It would be best if you learned the language. Connecting with your child can be difficult, but when you tap, chat, and your voice’s tone supports your communication. Your voice tone plays a vital role in building a bridge between you and your child.  You only need to learn their language and pay attention to their facial expressions and gestures when they use for fatigue, hunger, or demand for other things. Listen and recognize their sounds when they’re doing it. There ought to be some reason behind their sounds; try to understand.

Discover the reason behind their anger or any attitude of anger. Maybe they feel ignored or not understood. Your child frustration is a sign to make you know or get your attention.

A child affected by Autism is always a child. For both of you (child and parents), you both need a life other than therapy. Play with one another, especially when your child is awakened and happy. Laugh with each other, have fun so that your child may emerge from the shell of shyness. There are also many fun and educational games, where parents and kids can enjoy the time spent together. Keep in mind that play is an essential part of learning, as well.

Also, focus on your child’s sensory activities. Some children have trouble with light, sound, touch, taste or odour. If they are uncomfortable with any of these, avoid it. If you understand what affects your child, what causes discomfort or stress, you can prevent these demanding situations from happening.

Create an appropriate treatment plan that fits your child. Don’t complicate things when you hear from your parents, teachers or anyone else. Each autistic child is unique and has different strengths and weaknesses. Do not follow blindly what others had shared stories with you because maybe it was a blessing for them but it can turn curse to you. Take the advice of your doctor before you try anything for yourself.

Taking care of an autistic child requires a lot of effort and time. You may feel stressed and discouraged. Parental responsibilities are not easy, and it is more challenging to raise a child with special needs. To be the best parent, you have to take care of yourself. On your own, you cannot deal with it; you will need support. Don’t hesitate to ask for help from someone in your family or anyone you trust. 

It’s a long way to go, but you can do it.

Finally,

I want to add to those mean people who talk with no thought.

“DON’T MAKE JUDGMENTS ABOUT WHAT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND”.

Shaheen Kazi
Shaheen Kazi

Shaheen Kazi is an Indian author originally from Mumbai and has lived in the Gulf…

Shaheen Kazi

Shaheen Kazi is an Indian author originally from Mumbai and has lived in the Gulf (Saudi Arabia) for more than a decade and a half. After getting acquainted with IATA, she concentrates on her passion for writing. Her accomplishments include two books, 'AGE WAS JUST A NUMBER' (Romance Novel) and 'CUPIDS ARROW' (Poems) and two anthologies and many other upcoming projects. She also writes short pieces in Literature Times. Being an enthusiastic poet, author, writer, and creative thinker makes her a little unique in what she does. Books have always been her best friend; libraries and bookstores have always fascinated her from a young age. Mobiles are essential, but for her, the book is a beautiful world to live within. She is a non-kindle reader, and she can never read any book on kindle. She doesn't go anywhere without a book. She sees herself as the luckiest to continue her dream of becoming a novelist/poet and working on what she loves most. She firmly believes in being somebody when nobody thought you could be. Besides writing, she loves reading, travelling, knitting and singing. She is excellent in her culinary skills too.

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